Amit Karda

Edition VI

A Fable on the Lonely Table - by Amit Karda

A Fable on the Lonely Table

By Amit Karda

I lift again,
I lift again the so enchanted pen

and write a fable,
a fable of my love sitting without you, on the lonely table.

Oh I know, it was not supposed to be as it is now,
I know, I was the one who should have figured out how.

I am helpless, helpless but I don’t want to command pity,
at times, my feelings for you make these noisy areas dissolve into a silent abandoned city.

For what I am entitled shall be mine, someone told me.
But I do not know, if not with you will I do fine?

I might need someone to hold me.

You said I’ll be going places and love, you said, I deserve to.
I wonder, if we can go together, seats, I shall reserve for two.

You make me feel different, special, which I know might just be my imagination,
But I liked you, felt for you, loved you, I truly did, unfortunately without any anticipation.

No wonder then, how my bad it was.
 I need to change myself, fake a smile and move on,

The slightest of your sight sometimes,
got me off track and again things began to dawn.

It’s difficult, I know you know it’s difficult to be at peace with what you feel,
the agony of the pain, even when there are no visible wounds to heal.

But with all my heart I appeal to you to consider my request, give me some time,
please don’t abandon me, not just yet my love,
please don’t treat me as a worthless dime.

I wish I could change things, O I really do,
I wish I could make things easier, for you to have moments of love and happiness quite a few.

I’ve regretted nothing so far, and I hope I don’t from here on again,
but, it’s devastating to just go back to whatever it was earlier, and write with the same old pen.

I lift again,
I lift again the so enchanted pen,

and write a fable,
a fable of my unreciprocated love sitting alone on a lonely table.

A fable, a parable which irrefutably has a lesson to teach,
a lot of things, I have to do; a lot of goals to reach.

And still I am a believer of love and the power of the divine,
I try to abandon my feelings for you and embrace the pain,
because I know, that in the end
everything shall be fine.


Edition VIII

Searching... - by Amit Karda  (photo by Hieu Le)Photo credit: Hieu Le

Searching…

By Amit Karda

A battle inside me is on since so many lifetimes,

A rattle beyond control, noisy like the wind chimes

“Why?” I ask, for what is this task?
Am I no one or someone with an inconceivable mask?

So I enthrall myself into a journey, scared and in the state of paranoia,
Oh! this journey is haunting, questions arise every time during the metanoia.

Am I the body, the soul, the mind, the ego or am I just made of a subtle pride,
sometimes I want to feel nothing and just be carried away and sway with the tide.

I am deeply shaken at the core of my roots, with this unshakable curiosity,
sometimes I wish I was dumb enough to go with the flow, and skip this atrocity.

So I ask, I question, I doubt, I inquire, I dispute, I seek,
and after this, all I find is more curiosity, My god, the answers seem so oblique.

“Oh! Help me! Will you?” I shout at the sky, seeking shelter under the so called “higher power”,
I’ve been wandering, wandering to find a meaning, going from temple to temple, tower to tower!

This lust for a purpose and a meaning, has brought me experiences so incredible,
I am being treated differently, some love me unconditionally, while the others just recognize me as inedible.

Against the odds, I struggle, right out of the crowd, I snuggle,
to find you almighty,  I know, I shall have to and I will struggle.

In-spite of the efforts that I take, let me have the Divine taste,
fight towards what I can make, let my futile efforts be not a waste!

I pray, I chant, I fast, I meditate,
from my ego, I’ve tried to dissipate.

But in the end, I realize and I am aware,
the answers are to be found on the inside, and only that is true and fair!


Edition X

beats-by-amit-karda-photo-by-christopher-campbellPhoto credit: Christopher Campbell

Beats!

By Amit Karda

With all the belief and faith in my love for you I’ve been so vocal,
Talking here, describing there when I speak about you, I am never bifocal,

So the peace in my mind is jittered with your not so evident affection,
But after falling however many times, I always have felt the need for resurrection,

So I investigate into the heartbeats, which before knowing you were not so violent,
Feels like I’ve been waiting for so long now, but the answers are just so silent,

“Its all over” I shout at the violence inside me, and try to shut it off,
“Peace! Peace!! Peace!!!” I keep on chanting, but all it takes is a single thought of yours,

Which brings everything back to me, with much more intensity, that earlier seemed soft,
So I mention just to mention, I love just to love, nothing was a lie nothing was false

So my intent was to be intense,
I never designed the content to condense,

Little did I know, peace wasn’t just a way of chastity,
Like belonging to you wasn’t just a way to prosperity

It mattered more, more than it ever did to anyone I believe,
Still I ain’t with you love, yet alive, like I am forced to perceive,

So the point isn’t whether you’re there for me or you aren’t,
It is whether my heart still beats for you or it doesn’t!


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